Wednesday, June 22, 2005

GEORGE A. ROMERO'S LAND OF THE DEAD, rated R. That means gore and nudity and that I'll eventually have to see it.

Am I only one who is surprised that George Romero is still alive? He invented the zombie category back when zombie movies were first being made.

I'm a big fan. I love zombie movies. Just ask anyone who knows me. I even love ones I haven't seen (yet). The roots of my affection stem from two facts: Julia Roberts has never appeared in a zombie movie. And Pretty Woman was originally titled $3000, the amount of money it cost to buy her and what most actors are really worth.

Big name actors are getting paid so much nowadays that it's almost impossible for a studio to make any money. The big exception is with low-budget horror movies like this one. All you need are dark streets, cemeteries and/or shopping mall sets, hundreds of extras who can walk with their arms out like mummies or flopping around like they're paralyzed, a couple guys with chainsaws/bats/fire pokers, and a hot chick (who's not Julia Roberts). Mix well, and you have a sure thing that'll make a couple bucks without any big "stars."

In George A. Romero's latest movie, the only star is the script. Mankind is threatened by zombies who are coming back from the dead. A bunch of mismatched comrades including a hot chick barricade themselves in an ammo shop, a mall with an ammo shop, or a fort with an ammo depot. This unlikely band of man's last hope kills a lot of zombies, but not before the zombies kill the hot chick while peeing, making love, or both. Some other stuff happens and in the end the small number of brave souls left think they're safe...until another zombie pops up! Credits roll and you get up and leave your soda cup behind for some high school kid to clean up.

Bottom line: I'll love it.

On a scale of "Pretty Woman" on the low end and "Dawn of the Dead" on the high end, I give this movie $9.00 plus $3.50 for a soda.

2 Comments:

Blogger Jim McCarthy said...

While she's peeing?

1:47 PM  
Blogger Deborah Graff said...

It's the "or both" that I find disturbing.

7:51 PM  

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